


Belief

by SirLadySketch



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Brief Mention of Blood, Fighting, M/M, Minor Swearing, Roxas as a mentor, Struggle match, Working out your issues by beating each other other, minor identity crisis, tentative compromise/resolution
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-30
Updated: 2020-04-30
Packaged: 2021-03-01 22:16:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,412
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23924488
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SirLadySketch/pseuds/SirLadySketch
Summary: A friendly Struggle match, he’d said. Practice between training with the others, a way to test their abilities in a non-lethal way. And it had started out that way, more or less. An exercise between comrades (not friends, there were no delusions there), staged in the public arena so they could keep everything above board while providing the local yokels some entertainment. But neither of them was one to back down to a challenge, so when Roxas had been the first to draw blood, Isa was quick to follow suit.Post KH3 fic wherein Roxas and Isa talk things out by way of a Struggle bat. Axel is not amused.
Relationships: Akuroku, Axel/Roxas (Kingdom Hearts), hints of past AkuSai
Comments: 4
Kudos: 40





	Belief

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading through this for me, Plants!! <3

A friendly Struggle match, he’d said. Practice between training with the others, a way to test their abilities in a non-lethal way. And it had started out that way, more or less. An exercise between comrades (not friends, there were no delusions there), staged in the public arena so they could keep everything above board while providing the local yokels some entertainment. But neither of them was one to back down to a challenge, so when Roxas had been the first to draw blood, Isa was quick to follow suit.

Isa wasn’t sure how it happened, hadn’t really cared. One moment, he’d been diving in to attack Roxas’ unprotected side, the next he’d been thrown several paces back, lip bleeding from the smack of Roxas’ bat. Roxas had drawn back at once, lowering his weapon to call for a timeout, but Isa didn’t give him the chance. 

Roxas saw the attack just in time to deflect the blow. His lips tightened into a frown, face going grim, but he didn’t back down. That was good-- Isa hadn’t wanted him to. He could vaguely hear the distressed calls of Roxas’ local friends calling for them to end their match, but Isa ignored them, and Roxas just laughed, leaping back and gesturing to Isa to follow.

He didn’t hold back.

While his missions against enemies of the Organization had been few and fleeting, Saïx had not allowed his hours to pass idly by. While Xehanort schemed, he’d trained relentlessly, building his strength for the inevitable battle at the Keyblade Graveyard. It hadn’t mattered of course, Sora and Saïx’s former colleagues joining forces against him, but he’d held his ground well enough. Roxas had been the one to deliver the killing blow, though, almost an exact reenactment of their final battle in the Castle that Never Was. Even now, Isa could still feel the twinge of that strike.

Whether he knew it or not, Roxas hit him there again, sending Isa to the ground. As he sucked in his breath, trying to grit his teeth through the pain, the boy walked over, weapon held loose at his side.

“I’ll always be stronger than you,” Roxas said. Not unkindly, nor was he boasting, just stating the facts. And they both knew it to be true, although that admission stung as much as the blow. Roxas reached down and offered a hand to stand.

“You just use your anger when you fight, and going berserk makes your attacks wild and sloppy,” Roxas continued, walking over to pick up the Struggle bat and handing it back to Isa. “You need to learn how to control it better, especially if you want to become a keyblade master.”

“And you’re the expert?” Isa hissed, petulant, but Roxas simply shrugged.

“I don’t need a title to beat you. I’ve done it time and time again.” He paced back to his place across from Isa in the ring, bat held loose at his side, but Isa knew he’d spring to action without hesitation. Roxas rolled his shoulders to ease out some of the tension, then gestured for Isa to attack. He did, charging ahead, and three steps later he was on the ground again. Roxas helped him back up.

“You’re taller, stronger, have more muscle mass,” he continued as though he hadn’t just knocked Isa on his ass for the fifth time that day. “By all accounts, you should be the one helping me up.”

“I’m sure you’ll be happy to tell me what I’m doing wrong,” Isa gritted out, patting down his clothes and falling into a guard stance. Roxas scowled, lowering his bat just a little.

“I don’t like you,” he said, point blank. “I don’t like you, and I don’t think you’re worthy of holding a keyblade, let alone becoming a master. You’re an asshole who spent most of his life hurting others to further your own objectives, and the fact that you don’t seem to care tells me that I’m probably wasting my time trying to teach you.”

Isa bit back his response to that and charged instead, Saïx’s memories coming to him, unbidden. All that he’d done, all those he’d hurt along the way-- intentionally or not-- he’d done so with a purpose. First, it was to help the girl. A quiet voice from the darkness, pleading for their help, only to disappear without a trace. 

Then they fell into darkness and his only goal was to find a way to save themselves. He grew stronger, did what he had to in order to climb the ranks and gain Xemnas’ trust. But even as he worked towards that goal, he’d felt Lea pulling farther and farther away, leaving him to take off after the brats. It was all he could do to survive on his own, trying to make some sense of it all. It hadn’t even mattered in the end-- Sora had seen to that.

A familiar red haze began to burn at the corners of his eyes, his vision narrowing as he focused on his target. This, at least, was easy. _Roxas_ had been the reason Lea had left him all alone. _Roxas_ had been the reason everything had fallen apart. _Roxas_ was the one to blame, not him. 

Isa lunged, bearing all of his weight into the blow and letting his fury drive him forward. Roxas blocked the attack with some difficulty, taking a staggering step back to brace against the strength of the attack. Isa gritted his teeth in a feral grin, using his superior weight and strength to push even further, letting out a satisfied laugh as Roxas was forced to take another step back, then another. Roxas was the reason his life was in shambles, so Roxas should be the one to pay.

Then he was falling back, the swift kick to his stomach forcing him off of Roxas, who dove in low, dropping his Struggle bat and driving his elbow into Isa’s diaphragm. He fell to the arena floor again, unable to catch his breath. Black and white lights danced before his eyes, allowing the red to drain away as he tried to suck in breath to deflated lungs. A shadow hovered above him, motionless.

“Why?” Isa demanded through gritted teeth. He could taste blood, and for a moment he wondered if he’d managed to break a rib. Then he felt the cut in his lip where his teeth had bitten through, and spat out the reddened spit, just barely missing Roxas’ shoe. 

Roxas glared down at him, but held out his hand.

“Because you’re important to Axel,” he said at last. “And he believes in you. He thinks you’re more than Saïx’s legacy, you just can’t see it. So I’ll keep helping you get up, even if you don’t deserve it--” he gripped Isa’s hand a little more tightly than warranted as he helped him up-- “until I understand why.”

Isa glared down at him, their hands still locked together, unyielding. He could vaguely hear the nervous shifting of the townspeople at the sidelines, no doubt too afraid to interfere with fighters far beyond their own abilities. Roxas stared up at him, blue eyes intense and unwavering. There was something there, an unspoken challenge, but Isa wasn’t willing to address it, not yet. For now, they’d continue this dance, until one day, perhaps, they might find some compromise.

And that was how their current common ground found them, crashing through the Twilight Town teenagers to storm onto the field, so furious he might catch fire at any minute.

“What the _fuck_ is wrong with you?”

Roxas released Isa at once, stepping back and visibly forcing his emotions under control. Isa could still feel the anger radiating off of him, but some guilt seemed to surface as Lea stalked towards them. Isa snorted, drawing a sharp look from Roxas, and turned to Lea, schooling his face into placid indifference. Lea could put the boy in his place, even if Isa himself could not.

He took the opportunity to put a hand up to his swollen cheek in an effort to stem the blood dribbling down his face. Seeing it, Roxas gave a half-hearted gesture and a healing spell cooled the burn, closing torn and bruised skin. It wasn’t completely gone-- Roxas probably knew that and had left it incomplete just to spite him-- but it helped. Isa lowered his hand and crossed his arms as Lea stormed to a halt in front of them.

“A simple sparring match, nothing more,” Isa said, which temporarily focused Lea’s fury on him.

“The _fuck_ it was,” Lea spat, then turned back to glare at Roxas. “Hayner called me, telling me that you were in the process of trying to kill Isa.”

“Clearly I didn’t succeed,” Roxas replied in a voice equally tense, then he crossed his own arms as Lea made irritated sputtering noises. He sighed a little though, relenting. “It’s fine. Just wanted to beat some sense into him, that’s all. We got a little carried away, but he’s fine. I promised, didn’t I? Sorry it got a little rough.”

Isa’s brows lifted at that. _Promised?_ He saw the shift in Lea’s expression, and heard the softening of Roxas’ voice. It was minute, imperceptible to someone who didn’t know the young man, but the tension left Lea in a long, drawn out sigh. The man dragged his hand over his face, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“Yeah, I know, I just--” Lea cut himself short and turned to look at Isa. “You’re ok?”

Had it been anyone else asking him that, he’d feel affronted at the implication that he was incapable of taking care of himself, especially against someone as deceptively diminutive as Roxas. But it _was_ Roxas, and no one else in this world quite understood how powerful the boy actually was, no one except Xion, perhaps, but she’d left for a mission earlier that day. To be honest, she probably wouldn’t have stepped in anyway, knowing this was something they’d need to work out between the two of them.

He shrugged off Lea’s concern with a grunt. Lea studied him with a slight frown on his face, then looked back at Roxas, who reached out and laid a hand on Lea’s arm. Isa expected it to be a quick gesture of apology, but Roxas’ touch lingered. 

“I’m sorry we got carried away,” he said, voice softening further, and Isa saw Lea smile-- frustrated, yes, but he could see Lea’s anger dispelling. Then Lea’s hand came up to cover Roxas’, giving it a quick squeeze… and stayed there.

The realization hit Isa like a physical blow. But part of him had already known, already suspected, so instead of the sharp pain of betrayal and loss, all Isa felt was the numbness of his fears come to light. Had he been anyone else, he might’ve shouted, might’ve batted the boy away and grabbed Lea by the shoulders to shake some sense into him. Why _Roxas_? 

Then Roxas saw him staring and his expression went blank, all signs of that intimacy dispelled. But the hostility was gone, too. He broke away from Lea at last and held out his hand again, a peace offering. Isa expected him to gloat, yet another victory to hold against him, another battle won without there ever being the chance of a fair fight. 

_But,_ he thought as he took Roxas’ hand, _that wasn’t fair._ Saïx had lost the right to Lea’s respect long ago, and while his deeds to help the warriors of light had tipped the balance in their favor, it had been too little, too late. Was it any great surprise that he’d lost Lea’s-- no, _Axel’s --_ affections? There’d been nothing left _to_ lose.

“Like I was saying before, you keep falling because the only thing driving you is anger,” Roxas said. He knew, or at least suspected what Isa was thinking. But his voice held no pride, no reproval. But then he didn’t need to gloat-- he’d already won.

“Use the anger to add strength to your blows,” Roxas suggested, not letting go. “But fight with your heart. You have to _believe_ in what you’re fighting for, focus those feelings into your attack and let them guide your steps. That’s why you’re training with _me_ ,” he said. He gave Axel a sideways glance and allowed himself a small smirk. “ _I get it_. But if you don’t learn how to channel that fury, if you just let yourself go berserk without having something to fight for, you’re never gonna learn how to pick yourself up when you fall.”

 _Belief._ Such a simple, yet complex word. Isa had a purpose, once, what felt like a lifetime-- _two_ lifetimes ago. Find and rescue the girl. They’d failed in that, him and Lea. Currying favor with Xemnas had led to more failure. Had led to losing Lea.

He’d thought he might be able to recover that, at least. Working against Xehanort from within the Organization, he could’ve shown Lea that he was still his friend, still worth believing in. But somewhere along the way, Lea had become _Axel_ , a hard truth he’d have to come to terms with. He saw that in the way Axel watched Roxas, with irritation, yes, but fondness, too. _With love_.

Axel handled him a potion to help with the rest of his aches and bruises, and Isa pulled his hand from Roxas’ at last to take it. The shock was starting to wear off, but the numbness still remained. What purpose did he have in this life, if Lea was not beside him? How could he hope to find the girl when he kept failing at everything he set out to do?

A warm hand on his shoulder brought his attention back to the present, and Roxas gave it a strong squeeze before letting go. Isa studied him, thinking. Another regret, perhaps, Roxas and Xion both-- but they were also another chance to try again. 

“Believe in yourself, and you’ll find your purpose” Roxas repeated, and Isa felt something spark in that promise. He nodded, not knowing how it could be true, but feeling that somehow it must be. Believing it to be so. Roxas smiled; he must’ve seen something change in Isa’s face. He held out his hand again, an offering of friendship. “Until then, I’ll be there to help you back up.”

Isa smiled and took it.

“I believe you.”


End file.
